Okay, here’s the main gripes I have with the whole “zombie thing”. (And yes, yes, I know zombies “rule”, “kickass”, and are “the shit and totall pwn vampires” and all that crap. I got it. I don’t agree, but I hear your cries of Zombie love! Still: )

1. And this especially goes out to anyone who has ever said that the Vampire genre is overwrought… Oh my GOD the Zombie market is flooded. Zombies are everywhere. True, none of them sparkle, and some of the movies and books are pretty badass ( Deadline, Night of the Living Dead and Zombieland come to mind ), but for f***’s sake, can we just have a BREAK from all the freakin’ Zombie entertainment?

2. Zombies AREN’T SEXY! That is one thing, among many, that the Vampires will always have over the Zombies, the ability to be sexy, romantic, or hell, even multi-faceted… Zombies are simply… Zombies.

3. Zombies to not have an archetypal equivalent, at least not that I can see. E.G., Vampires can represent the Shadow Self, the Repressed Self, etc. Zombies… no. To me, there’s nothing psychologically riveting about Zombies. They are somehow-reanimated corpses that have to be killed in very specific ways, usually to stop the spread of an “infection”, which caused their zombification in the first place.

It’s a great concept, but I think its time has come and gone… and come… and gone.